23 WEEKS!!!!!!! Y’all.. I think this is happening. *cue excitement*
My excitement has been building. I feel a little more secure but even in saying that feeling anxious. That is the reality of pregnancy after loss; you always have the fear lurking in the background no matter what is going on. I’ve been alternating between my MFM and regular OB to where I see someone every two weeks. We had our first anatomy ultrasound at 19 weeks and have needed a subsequent appointment because Frick and Frack REFUSED to cooperate. The doctor is finally comfortable that she has seen everything that she needed. I am going back next Friday at 24 weeks for one last check of the chambers of their hearts. One of the perks of a twin pregnancy is supposed to be all of the ultrasound pics that you get. Meanwhile, I have one set of pics from their 12 week appointment. One. At my OB’s office, the equipment is so substandard that everything that she prints me looks like it was drawn on an etch a sketch. Next week I am HOPING they cooperate so I can get some decent pics for the baby books. Other good news from the ultrasound.. GENDERS!! We found out we are having a boy and a girl :))))))) I literally couldn’t ask for anything more.
That’s all the good news. For the not so great news, this pregnancy has been kicking my ASS. I am officially on modified bed-rest because of something called SPD Symphysis Pubic Dysfunction. The short summary is my pelvis has prepped itself for delivery too early. So in essence it always feels like my groin is ripping apart. This is a common complication with twins supposedly. Walking, getting in and out of the car, rolling over in bed are all TORTUROUS. But again, trying to take it all in stride. Last night I spent half of the night sleeping propped up in the recliner because laying on my sides (like you’re supposed to) makes my hips go numb. Laying on my stomach is a nono and laying on my back is miserable for my heartburn.
Hmm what else? My Sis in Law is having a shower for us in NY on the 20th of this month. My other shower is on the 4th of June. Invites went out this week and my anxiety peaked to an all time high. Next weekend Hubbins wants to do an official social media announcement. I’m excited but there is always that nagging voice that says “am I setting people up to let them down again?”? Trying my best to quiet that voice.
My MFM and I had a talk this last week about what timing of positive outcomes looks like for the twins. We have mini goals. First goal is 24 weeks. Then 28 weeks. Our ultimate goal is 38 weeks but she is comfortable with 36. I can’t think that far ahead. I’m still going day by day and week by week. It is flying and dragging all at the same time. I think that is all for now. Will update again soon.
faithhopefear 