13 weeks

13 weeks

Due Date: July 15, 2016

Baby Nugget is the size of a: Small peach and measures about 2.9 inches .

Total weight gain: -2.2 lbs. I am up a pound this week from last week but doctor is still really pleased with my weight gain thus far.

Maternity Clothes: A belly band when I wear jeans. I did invest in some soft cotton bras to sleep in this week and they have been life changing. My breasts feel like boulders and I have maybe 2 more weeks in my current bras.

Stretch Marks: No new ones… I don’t think. #huskygirlproblems

Sleep:  Due to being up worrying about the cerclage, I haven’t been sleeping well. Post cerclage last night, I maybe got 3 hours but I don’t feel tired. Maybe this is the famed 2nd trimester energy spurt starting to kick in?

Best Moment of the Week: Knowing my cerclage was successful and seeing Baby Nugget’s heartbeat after the procedure.

Miss Anything? Not really this week. My appetite has been weird.

Movement: Too soon to tell.

 

Food cravings: I crave different things but usually when I get them I have no appetite for them. This week I wanted NY style pizza, a gyro and a turkey hero and ate maybe 6 bites of each before I was full.

Anything make you sick or queasy: Having an empty stomach. The smell of onions or garlic.

Gender/Sex Prediction: I feel it is a girl. Planning to not find out till our reveal shower sometime in April/May.

Labor signs: Thankfully no!! I need these to not be a thing for a good long time.

Symptoms:  Nothing not cerclage related this week other than Boulder Breasts but I’m sure that isn’t going away anytime soon.

Belly button in or out: In.

Wedding rings on or off: On.

Bump: Meh.. who knows. I feel slightly fluffier. Eventually, I’ll start adding pictures once it looks more like a baby and less like tacos.

Happy or Moody: Extremely happy my procedure went well. I know I was worried about the procedure but I feel almost like I have an insurance policy now and I feel a little more secure in my pregnancy. Also, feeling extremely blessed to have regular ultrasounds scheduled.

Looking forward to: Seeing Nugget on Monday and getting my first post cerclage cervical measurement. Additionally, my dad’s birthday is next weekend and we are planning to drive to North Carolina and will tell him on his birthday on Friday. I ordered a onesie that says “Grandpa’s future fishing buddy” and I can’t wait to see the look on his face.

 

 

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My Cerclage Experience

I can’t believe it is over and done with! I anxietied about this procedure since I heard that my doctor was going to do it. Wednesday I stayed home from work and did some chores at home because I didn’t know what state I would be in after my procedure on Thursday. Then I attempted to sleep on Wednesday night but ended up staying up most of the right reading my bible and singing trying to reassure myself that it would be alright.

Thursday morning we woke up and reported to Outpatient surgery. I have to say that I was so impressed with everyone who touched any part of this process: from registration to the nurses to anesthesia to the OR and recovery team, they did an amazing job at not only reassuring me during the process but in catering to the fact that I am control freak who needs to know what is happening every step along the way. Back in pre-op I did face a few uncomfortable moments when one nurse asked “Is this your first?” and seeing me hemming and hawing over how to answer she apologized profusely and then bought 2 other nurses over who had losses followed by successful pregnancies with cerclages. These  two women became my ‘mother hens’for my entire day of the procedure. They checked on me in recovery and one even gave me her phone numbers so I could call her cell in case I had any questions about anything during the remainder of my pregnancy. She kept saying “I will be praying for a completely uneventful, boring pregnancy for you”.

The anesthesiologist came back and spoke to me about the plan for the epidural for the procedure as they were hesitant to have me under general anesthesia this early in pregnancy. Then I kissed Hubbins goodbye and went back to the OR. OMG. WHY ARE OR’s SO COLD??!! I’m sure it has to do with infection control but sweet baby Jesus. I ended up with 6 blankets on and a body warmer contraption by the time we were done. The worst part of my entire experience was having the epidural placed. My nurse anesthetist kept reminding me that these are usually done when you are in the midst of labor and contractions are kicking your tail so the pain just merges together but my goodness!! It took them two tries; one with the nurse anesthetist and once by the anesthesiologist because apparently at 5″5 I have a little frame (words I have never heard in life) and the spaces in between my vertebrae are relatively small. It felt like someone had taken a spear and was shoving it in my back and down one side of my body. The second attempt was bad but the medicine began to take effect quickly. It was the weirdest feeling ever; I could feel my legs being tingly (imagine when your foot falls asleep) but I could do nothing to move them. For the rest of the time, they would say “we are going to move your leg now” and I would respond “I believe you”. The only other uncomfortable part of the process was the nausea. That was due to me having an empty stomach as I had nothing since 10 the night before and the fact that the table was tilted on an incline to allow for my doctor to be positioned better. However, my trusty team came through and I learned that rubbing alcohol wipes under your nose for a minute or so will take that nauseous urpy feeling away.

Once the epidural was in I was on the table for maybe 25-30 mins and then to recovery. Before leaving recovery, you have to be able to use the restroom and be able to stand on your own. This took about two hours during which I napped and Hubbins watched Netflix. About an hour in they came and did an ultrasound of the baby and after that I felt a lot better although the quality of the ultrasound wasn’t as clear as the one at Maternal Fetal Medicine. My discharge instructions include no heavy lifting and taking it easy for the next two days. My OB has placed me on pelvic rest (all the sad faces from Hubbins) but he is on board with it. The bleeding was light yesterday and has all but ceased today which is great for my peace of mind. I follow-up with my OB in two weeks but luckily for me I had a cervical length scheduled at MFM for this coming Monday so I get to see Nugget in a few days. The cerclage is slated to stay in till 36 weeks but may come out earlier at 32 weeks depending on how things are looking.

Recovery wise, last night my chief complaint was my back. It is really sore and I declined the Oxycodone that my doctor offered for pain. I am certain she would not have given it if it was safe for baby but I do feel like I don’t want to chance that strong of a drug. So I have been using Tylenol and ice and that has helped a lot. Today I am still pretty sore and I feel a few more cramps than I did yesterday. I have been on the couch and/or in bed most of the day. Hubbins and I did go to Walmart today and after about 20 minutes I could tell that I needed to return to the couch. I don’t go back to work till Monday so I will be laying low this weekend.

I want to thank you all for your thoughts and prayers yesterday. I felt so much calmer because I knew that there were so many people sending positive vibes my way.

I also need to shout out my husband. He is such a calm reassuring force and he understands me so well. When we were waiting in pre-op and he could see my nerves building while we were delayed, he pulled out a deck of cards and helped take my mind off of my endless wondering. Last night, when insomnia had me up at 2 am for about 5 hours, he was by my side on the couch. I can’t get out of bed or cough or turn without him being awake and asking if I am alright. He is going to make such a wonderful Dad and I can’t wait to see him in that role.

Cerclage 

Is scheduled for Thursday . Waiting to confirm a time. I’m freaking out. I feel like I knew this could happen but now it is. The only major surgical procedure I’ve ever had was the D&C after Langston. Intellectually I know this a safe relatively easy procedure. I know this. But there is a part of me that is obsessing over what could happen and the what ifs of things going wrong. Like I can’t make a good choice; I have to do this because I can’t just wait and hope nothing happens this time. Afterwards, she said expect bleeding and cramping so of course that is great for my peace of mind. Baby Nugget be strong; let’s both make it through this. If you remember me Thursday, send some good thoughts my way. 

NT Scan and MFM Consult

I went in for the 2nd part of my NT scan today. Usually, the blood work and the ultrasound are done at the same visit but since they wanted to try to speed things along for me as we are approaching 13 weeks, I had the finger stick done last Monday and the ultrasound today.

Like I told you guys, my anxiety had been building about this appointment simply because it was going to be the first time seeing Nugget since the 16th of December. My appointment was at 3 pm and I got there around 2:45. Now for this ultrasound they tell you show up with a full bladder because it helps get a better picture for the tech. I showed up ready to burst because I am nothing if not an extremist…. and the staff let me know that they were running late. Apparently, babies don’t care that each appointment is scheduled for 30 minutes and they do what they want when they are good and ready. As such, I didn’t get called back till 3:40. Surprisingly, I wasn’t upset. Other than feeling like a balloon, I was comfortable. The staff was very good at updating me every 15 minutes regarding how many people were ahead of me.

Once I got back, the fun began. During the NT scan, they need to accomplish three things: 1. Measure the baby from crown to rump 2. Measure a fold at the back of the baby’s neck 3. Confirm the presence of the nasal bone. Nugget was fine with 1 and 2. Item 3 took a total of an hour and a half, 3 ultrasound techs and the doctor to accomplish. Baby was doing flips, potential handstands, covering their face, mooning the tech, EVERYTHING except presenting the profile view that was needed. FINALLY, the 3rd tech, who happened to be the Lead Sonographer, with much pressure and maneuvering was able to get a profile pic and we were done. All looks well. Measurements are within range. These measurements were then placed in the computer along with blood work results and used to calculate risks for Trisomy 13, 18 and 21. All of my numbers show a risk of 1 in 100,000 or greater!!! Hooray!

While all these games of hide and go seek were going on, I had plenty of time to speak with Dr. N who is the High Risk OB regarding her suggestions/recommendations regarding a cerclage. At this appointment my cervix was closed and measures 4.10cm. This is a great number and she said she sees no signs of incompetent cervix because usually when they ask you to bear down and you have IC, you should see the cervix opening and they didn’t see that. However, she did say that she could go either way on the cerclage and it really is up to me and how I feel. She will be doing biweekly cervical length measurements through week 32. I did tell her that I felt I wanted to do it because with losing our son, there was no warning; I had actually had an ultrasound done the afternoon that my water broke and everything had looked fine. While I understand the risks associated with surgery,  I would never be able to forgive myself for not doing everything preventative in my power to keep my baby. Dr. N. wholeheartedly agreed and stated that she would prefer to place it now while I have plenty cervix to work with vs. waiting till it shortens and attempting an emergent cerclage.

At the end of my appointment, I made all my biweekly appointments for cervical length and growth checks through the end of my pregnancy.Yes, it did cause anxiety to be planning that far ahead but I also felt hopeful because I know that she is taking my concerns very seriously. The next step today is the consult with my primary OB Dr. H where we will discuss the visit yesterday and decide how to proceed. It is quite possible that I will be having a procedure in the next few days *gasp*

This was a longer post than expected. Sorry guys. But I figure I have been lax in journaling so this blog serves dual purpose. I may just print these out and keep them in my baby journal.  I’ll post again once I know what is happening after I meet with Dr. H. today.
Baby dust to all 🙂

 

“OMG!!! We are so surprised! We don’t even know how this happened!!”

“OMG!!! We are so surprised! We don’t even know how this happened!!”

*Disclaimer* This is a ranty shouty post.*

That  was the caption that announced a Facebook pregnancy announcement accompanied by a picture of a positive pregnancy test.

___Side rant___  I will never not be grossed out by people who share pictures of a stick that they peed on with 895 of their closest friends. I feel differently about the blogs on here of course but there is something about your pastor and your aunt and your nephew you never really met who friended you and you couldn’t say no to seeing something that you urinated on. I could be being irrational *shrug*

Anyhow, after seeing this post, I could only see red for a couple reasons:

  1. You don’t know how this happened? It happened because sex. I know.. that’s a hard concept to grasp but that’s how it works. You have the sex, you get babies. UNLESS…you are one of the infertiles who have the sex on our head, on the bed, on a chair, in the air (Dr. Seuss would be proud) and it still requires a football team worth of medical professionals and an act of God and a drop of rain from the first rainfall of the year in the Amazon for us to “fall” pregnant.
  2. You are 24. You live at home. Your ‘boyfriend’ works at Target. You work at a gas station. Not that it is not possible but do you know how much babies cost? What is the plan here? I know you probably don’t have one because you are so surprised and still don’t know how this happened.
  3. You peed on this stick this morning and you’re announcing to all the internets that you are 2 minutes pregnant. I envy your confidence. I enjoy the naivete that believes that 2 lines on a stick leads to a baby 9 months later. Because you know what, it doesn’t always work that way.

After I shared my ranting manic thoughts with Hubbins he reminded me that we ARE pregnant. So then I felt horrible. Because I am and I shouldn’t begrudge anyone that happiness. But I still feel angry because I know of so many people who have been on this fertility trek for YEARS and they are weary and scared and on the verge of giving up. They are risking their physical well beings, financial stability and mental sanity for even the CHANCE at getting pregnant and those are the people that I want the ‘surprise’ pregnancies for. So while I wish you the best, you are going to be muted while you figure this part of your life out. And now I feel like a bitter hag.

12 weeks! 

Due Date: July 15, 2016

Baby Nugget is the size of a: Lime

Total weight gain: -3.2 lbs. I did a lot better with being intentional about drinking more water. Trying to hold off on my weight gain for as long as I can.

Maternity Clothes: A belly band when I wear jeans. Luckily, I work in scrubs so those feel the most comfy. I am dangerously near to needing new bras..trying to hold out.

Stretch Marks: No new ones… I don’t think. #huskygirlproblems

Sleep:  Better this week. I purchased a Cold Mist humidifier and with the help of that and a vile tasting concoction of garlic and honey that my friend whipped up for me, I am averaging about 6 hours a night. I still need at 2 hour nap when I get home in the evening though. 

Best Moment of the Week: Hubbins and I spoke about potential plans for our room once baby gets here. It is the first we have mentioned anything for the future regarding this pregnancy.

Miss Anything? Steak cooked to medium temp. NYE Champagne!

Movement: Too soon to tell.

Food cravings: Ramen noodles!!!

Anything make you sick or queasy: Water. I have to squeeze a lemon or lime in it to keep it down. Also..did you know water can give you heartburn? No? Me either.

Gender/Sex Prediction: I feel it is a girl. Planning to not find out till our reveal shower sometime in April/May.

Labor signs: Thankfully no!! I need these to not be a thing for a good long time.

Symptoms:  I have noticed that around my ankles seem “vein-ier” (I’m sure that’s not a word). My mom got terrible varicose veins during both of pregnancies so I have always been in fear of these.

Belly button in or out: In.

Wedding rings on or off: On.

Bump: Meh.. who knows. I feel slightly fluffier. Eventually, I’ll start adding pictures once it looks more like a baby and less like tacos.

Happy or Moody: Anxious? Not knowing what is going to happen in the next week or so regarding the cerclage is a little too much for my Type A personality that has to plan everything.

Looking forward to: NT ultrasound scan on the 4th. I will also get the blood work back from my genetic tests. On the 5th, I go to Dr. H. and we decide on the cerclage date.

 

I really hope everyone has a wonderful 2016. 2015 was hard but I am glad that I have had a chance to meet all of you, share your stories and start to find my place in a new community of friends.

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